Boys Night Redux

So, last night, there were moments of greatness and moments of great SUCK! My short assessment is that we've seen the last of Bobby Bennett and either David "I'm No Harry Connick, Jr." Radford or Patrick "Why'd I Have to Go First??" Hall. I have had my requisite 2 cups of coffee and look forward to passing judgement and calling out the wannabes where I see them.

Let the games begin ...

(1) Patrick Hall. Yes, he's got a lovely voice. His performance of "If" was beautiful and, if he's lucky, people will remember that. It might be the only thing that saves him tonight. His unfortunate choice of "Come to My Window" was waaaaaa-hay-hay too much for him. His tone was OK, but it was really cheesily done. That may just be a product of being used to hearing an edgy, gravelly voice singing it. I think that Mr. Hall needs to do a lot of finger-crossing and should thank David Radford for sounding as ridiculous as he did. See below.

(2) David Radford. Where do I start??? You would think that they'd have learned after the John Stephens fiasco that this whole crooner thing just doesn't work. I'm sure it'll be very effective for Mr. Radford [when he's in college] in charming the pants (quite literally) off of co-eds. For now, however, the music industry already has a Harry Connick, Jr. soundalike. His name is HARRY CONNICK, JR. And we don't need TWO of him. One is quite enough, thanks. Before the peformances started last night, I would have bet that David Radford would be the teen idol to go forward, but I think that honor will go to Will Makar. My guess is that it's 85%-15% that Mr. Radford will be on his way home tonight.

(3) Bucky Covington. Predictable. I remember this guy when his name was Bo Bice. But at least then he could sing. Hmmmm ... grungy Southern rock type sings Lynrd Skynrd. How original! (YAWN.) Maybe next week he'll slip in a little Molly Hatchet! Hooooo doggie!! I'm sure he can do better but (A) he's not bright enough to remember the words to "I Can't Help Myself" and (B) I don't know if I can take a season full of his teeth (see Elliott Yamin). He seems like a nice boy, however, so he's got that whole good ol' boy thing going for him.

(4) Will Makar. Ahhhh, yes. The boy whose name is now plastered across the backs of notebooks of high school girls everywhere, as in, "Mrs. Will Makar" in various forms of curlicue writing (in each case, the "I" is dotted with either a heart or a flower.) He is adorable, no question, and I think he'll sail through. He actually has a decent voice and might have some real potential. I have absolutely nothing snarky to say about him. Pity.

(5) Sway Penala. BEST intro of the night. Yes, it was cheesy, but when Mr. Seacrest said, "Where there's a Will, there's a Sway", I laughed out loud. But I digress. I liked his performance. There were moments when I thought his falsetto was a little much, but I thought he did justice to what's a pretty challenging song. I think that he needs to lose the silly hat (the least he could have done was wear something other than WHITE ... I mean come ON! It's not even Memorial Day yet. Sheesh!) He should be solid as a rock tonight.

(6) Chris Daughtry. LOVE him! I mean, his facial hair is ridiculous, but I love his voice. He just has that certain ... something, doesn't he?? He also has a terrific sort of "come hither" quality that, while not as intense as Ace "Smoldering" Young, really melts my butter. I think that he'll be a solid member of the boys' contingent well into the final rounds.

(7) Kevin Covais. He's cute in a kind of "science fair" sort of way. I think that his voice is good enough to carry him a little farther, but I think he may be one of those ones who goes farther than he should (see John Stephens) because he's got protective mother hen types making sure he doesn't get his feelings hurt. I thought he did pretty well, but he'll need to do better to compete with Chris, Ace and Elliott.

(8) Gedeon McKinney. This guy is just plain weird. I mean, I think his voice is really good and he certainly sings with energy, feeling, etc., but is he channelling some 3rd rate Southern preacher when he talks? His speech pattern coupled with that "I'm Crazy Enough to Kill" smile of his make me really uncomfortable. He's got a terrific voice but could end up going earlier than he should simply because he's annoying.

(9) Elliott Yamin. WOW! I mean, WOW! I thought he was grrrrrrr-eat. I think he blew the doors off of that song and set himself up to be "the man to beat". People always think that singing Stevie Wonder is going to make them sail through, but everyone always chooses either "You Are The Sunshine of My Life" (see Brenna from Monday night) or "Ribbon in the Sky". Not only did he make an original choice, he sang the you-know-what out of it. HOW-EV-ERRRR ("and I'm not being rude") ... he needs a stylist STAT! He needs to ditch the George Clooney-circa-1995 haircut and the silly Amish-style beard. Let's send him a box of Whitestrips to start (shudders with fright). Appearance notwithstanding, he was awesome. Loved him.

(10) Bobby Bennett. Ouch. Need I say more? Oh ... right. Buh-bye.

(11) Ace Young. Ai papi!! You can be my father figure anytime! I thought my pants were going to burst into flames. Seriously. Hot, hot, hot and, yet again, HOT. And he can sing! Did I forget to mention that part??? I thought his song choice was terrific and I thought he sang it very well, to boot. He had every woman, and a great deal of men, I'd wager, that were watching the performance drooling all the way to their phones to vote again, and again, and again.

(12) Taylor Hicks. THAT guy is terrific! He is different from anyone Idol's ever had. I think he's great and don't mind his whole Joe Cocker twitchy thing. It's almost like he's channelling some other being while he's singing (pretty funny) and I love how psyched he is about the whole thing. I think he's great and I think he's going to be right in the hunt for a while.

So, here are my predictions for tonight. We will say tearful (*sniff*, *sniff*) goodbyes to: (1) Stevie Scott (2) Heather Cox (3) Bobby Bennett (4) David Radford (possibility for Patrick Hall).