The Cornflake & The Melon

So, let me get this straight. The moth who finds the cornflake always finds the melon? Hmmm. I always thought it was the other way around.

Whahubba???

Confucious say that Paula took an extra Vicodin today. While she generally spews forth with unintelligible drivel in her comments to the contestants, tonight she looked downright schnockered. She had that telltale ear-to-ear grin that people often get when they've sampled too much of the wacky weedus, if you know what I mean.

But enough about our favorite mushmouth.

The Group Performance: Can I just say how much I loathe the song Love the One You're With? Has anyone ever stopped to think about the sentiment behind this song? It's really quite poignant. If you can't be with the one you love, just love the one you're with. OK. "Honey ... I know you're away on business, but Ace stopped by to visit ..." UGH! As we explore the group performance even further, we see that Paris has opted for bike shorts and a sort of Flashdance-throwback top. Ouch. It seems that Lisa hit the Item of the Week sale at Old Navy, as she's been sporting tank tops in every color of the rainbow. Last week's performance of Take It Easy was way better.

Why We All Watched Tonight: I LOVE it when I'm right. Especially when it coincides with the demise of someone as utterly hateful as Brenna Gethers. I am feeling some deep-seated satisfaction right now. Not only did she get the heave-ho, she was the lowest vote-getter. But she didn't disappoint ... her exit speech exuded the same class as the rest of her appearances. That's right: NO class whatsoever. I feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Like the way you feel after having a nice, snarky cup of cocoa.

As for the others, no surprises there. Heather: you were no match for Mariah; David: stop trying to channel the Rat Pack for a while; Sway: unless you can set the world on fire, Stevie'll kill you every time. Bad choice.

So, I feel like shouting from the rooftops. I bid you all a wonderful night and leave you with these words of wisdom: the difference between a good performance and a bad one could be whether you decided to eat pizza or a salad.

Think about that.